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To think that what you just did was the legal way to go about it, well, that isn’t so. You going to recall me too?”“I can, if necessary.” Nunez warned harshly. “The situation is that critical.”Ben rotated his whole body to face the Colonel. “Sir, respectfully, you do not have the authority. I seem to remember somebody saying you were next up for command. Please tell me you don’t want to alienate the entire enlisted portion of the unit. If it’s important, sit down and explain it to us. But don’t pull any high-and-mighty moral superiority. You don’t have the juice. Not with the th—two of us. Not here; not now.”Nunez thought for a bit. “Fine, I’ll tell you what I know. But I’m not putting up with any more disrespect. I put my life on the line to come here.”John laughed harshly. “What you know? You came here ready—prepared to assume command. An assumption, I might add that ain’t happening. What did you know that made you get that all lined up? I know you didn’t come up with it just. There are nine players in the batting order, and eight of them are good at hitting the ball and reaching first base. The exception is the pitcher. According to Rule 178.05©, the pitcher must be a worse batter than Bob Uecker, who was so bad that his lifetime batting average is lower than [i]Mario Mendoza’s[/i]. You’d think that an athlete good enough to pitch in the major leagues could hit better than an 85-year-old like Uecker, but that’s not the case.Baseball has another rule. If the batter gets hit by a pitched baseball, the batter automatically goes to first base. Your typical pitcher is so bad at hitting that his best bet at reaching first is to stick his head into the batter’s box and hope that the ball hits it. As you might expect, Jim Bunning was a pitcher. There are few people who can take such punishment, so a more typical at-bat for a pitcher consists of him closing his eyes and just moving the bat around randomly, because then he might accidentally hit the ball somewhere..
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